Wednesday, August 22, 2012

When the Words Are Choked Away, It’s Good.

What kind of crier are you?

Do you sob? Snivel? Weep?

Me—I’d like to think I’m a *solitary tear down the cheek, graceful sniffles* sort.

But… I’m not.

When I cry, there is lip-biting/trembling. Followed by voice-wavering. Which unleashes the waterworks that I’m still trying to hold back so they come out in a tug-o-war, and land in snot smudges on my sleeve.  Contorted muscles in my face try but fail to hold it back, setting my being to muted writhing.
...Yep. That's about right. Contorted facial muscles and all.

It’s a little bit horrific.

And the other thing? I (usually) don’t cry easily, so they always sneak up on me, these attacks of blithering would-be sobs.

So why is all of this on my mind? Oh, probably something to do with what happened at a recent Bible study.

After the study, we all gathered to pray over someone who is setting off on a new adventure, a new chapter in their lives. It’s wonderful! And, as departures are with people so close they’re family, it’s sad, too.

I decided to pipe up and pray. There were lots of things to be thankful for, and I wanted to voice them. But then? When I opened my mouth, that wavering voice came out. Brink-of-tears voice. Oh-no-here-we-go-there’s-no-stopping-it-now voice. So the sequence of tear-wars described above ensued, my throat closed, and I ended up stammering something eloquent like “Thank you for—that!” Instead of the long list I had in mind.

You know what, though? I cried because it was family, family-in-Christ, we were gathered for. People I love. People I’m blessed with. So blessed they choked the words right out of a girl who could swim in sentences for hours trying out structures and synonyms and literary devices until it’s just-so.

When the words are choked right out of a word nerd, that is a blessing indeed. His people, these cherished friendships, family in Christ, shared growing in Him, witnessing Him working and growing and using someone for His glory over the years—what an honor. What a gift.

One beyond words.

 This song isn’t QUITE fitting, since I wasn’t at a “loss” for words, per se.  I had them in spades, but they got squished in the thankfulness. Still, the sentiment fits.

What about you? I’d love to hear about a time when your thankfulness exceeded—or closed off—the words.

I'm guest-posting at Christian Mama's Guide today. Come visit with me over at my friend Erin MacPherson's blog, where I'm sharing "Off the Wall Tips for New (or New Again) Moms"

Better yet, come back here this Friday to read Erin's "Better Than Fiction: Real Historical Romance Tales" guest post! It's a gem, and one that'll have you smiling at the gumption of her own ancestors.


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